SHIT STORM HITS D.C.


Politics


WASHINGTON – Residents and lawmakers on Capital Hill are recovering after being hit by Shit Storm Trump on Thursday. The Washington Post reported that during an immigration policy meeting with senators from both parties, he slipped up and exposed himself, once again, as a bigot.

“Why are we having all these people from shithole countries come here?” Trump asked during a conversation about El Salvador, Haiti, and Africa. When discussing green cards for people from Haiti, The Donald continued with, “Why do we need more Haitians? Take them out”. To add insult to injury President Trump also asked why the U.S. couldn’t get more Norwegian immigrants instead.

At the White House Press Briefing on Friday, Sarah Huckabee Sanders only fueld the flames when she fired back at news reporters who were questioning whether or not the President of the free world is a racist. “He certainly is not a racist. He’s never been racist towards me or his family or anyone else”. When CNNs Jim Acosta pointed out that she and the Trump family is white, Huckabee Sanders called him “unpatriotic” then asked “Have you met Dr. Ben Carson? He’s colored and President Trump appointed him as Secretary of Housing and Urban Development”.

Shit Hole

As if the shit storm wasn’t causing enough damage, The Donald decided to tweet a response at Monday at 3:11am. “The melting pot is full and is overflowing onto the beautiful white stove we used to have”. In what one could assume was a sleep deprived outburst fueld by early stages of dementia, the irritable President obviously wanted to clear things up and set the record straight on ShitGate. “I never said Shit Hole. I said I had to shit. President’s shit to”.

Everyone can agree that presidents shit too, but to tweet about it may be considered to be below the office of the Presidency. But then again, when you gotta go, you gotta go.